Monday, March 3, 2008

"Tipper" is a 50/50

Everyone keeps asking me what names we've picked out for the little fetus within. But I hear all these other people telling me not to tell anyone what names we've picked out because, and though they may deny it - they totally would, people will give us their opinions and that is just not acceptable. I do not take opinions. I am a fastidious opinion ignorer. It's kind of like "my thing". (See: Moving to New York or Getting Fired from my Job for calling off too much).

However, to appease the masses and shut you all up, I will now list and thereby narrow down the choices of what we are considering, the names we will not choose:


Matilda, Carrie, Brenda, Gertrude, Theodora, Ingrid, Jyväskylä, and Penelope.

Richard, Richard, Richard, Richard, and Richard. And Robert.

Anyone with suggestions may leave them here, and no, I will not name my kid after you.

Anywho - I'm midway through my third or fourth cold of this winter, deeelicious. My tonsils are the color and size of those bitter red apples. The common greeting I have been receiving at work is, "Hi! You sound terrible!" Thank you and have a stupertastic day, I feel amazing. The last one lasted about 11 days so I'm figuring about 6 more days to this one. I'm through two boxes of Aloe kleenex and three Shower Soothers. The Sudafed plug-it-in is a waste-of-money. I had such high hopes for it too. Sad. Well, I guess that just adds proof to the pudding (a. Is that what I mean? b. What does that mean?) that if it sounds too good to be true, it's too expensive to afford.

I'm going home on Friday to Columbus - holy in the name of the lord it's way overdue. After about a month or 6 weeks of being in this freakshow, er, city, I come down with this intense homesickness similar to the Bubonic Plague or the Clap. And boy, does my crotch ever itch right now. It's time to see how normal life can be and be comfortably separated from strangers by at least 3-4 feet at all times. I really miss grocery shopping with a big cart and a car to load the bags into so the plastic doesn't rip the flesh from my palms as I waddle the 14 blocks home from our closest market. Ahhhhhh. Serenity now.

In other random news Monday, I have made little to no progress on the knitting of my $55 scarf, so I'm hoping to do some of that while traveling by plane, train, and automobile this weekend. Also, it will be the first time Laugh More goes mobile with my new laptop - look how sneaky and technical I am. Though posting will probably be uninevitable due to the plethora of people and children and food I will be accosted with upon landing at Port Columbus International Airport. Which is absofreakinglutely fine with me.

Enjoy your week and fill it with details.

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